Hilarious new Whatsapp status

Take a look at some some cool Whatsapp status updates on your phone. These Whatsapp quotes and messages will impress your friends and contacts . They are funny and laughable so put them up and share them with whoever you wish to.

I wish Whatsapp would charge some subscribers for being stupid and pay others for being awesome.

Hey pimples, if you
choose to stay and occupy my face I think you ought to pay rent too.

Upgrade your cool karma to such a level that you don't have to explain to your grand kids. Their history teacher will.

There are a lot of fishes in the sea. Don't you go down until you find a mermaid.

Confidence is like the ace of cards. If you believe that you're the coolest so will everyone else.

Remember that girls like a guy to give them a manly hug. That one arm hug is for sissies.

A wise man once said...nothing. He kept quite and avoided a deadly war with his girlfriend.

I tell everyone that I cook really well. When I begin even the fire alarm starts ringing with happiness.

Mom and dad...I heard money doesn't grow on plants. That is exactly why I ask for it from you.

Hope you are having a good time reading these funny Whatsapp messages. You can even use these on Facebook status updates. A good way to go with them is to put up one status update on Facebook and a different status update on Whatsapp. This is because you may have friends who have already read your Whatsapp status and may just scroll without liking your post on Facebook because they've already read it.

When impressing women, money is the key. If it grew on trees, they wouldn't even mind dating a gorilla.

I made a wish and asked Santa Claus to get me the hottest person. Next morning I woke up in a package.

Statistics say that there is a 99.99% chance that you're really cool. Act like it.

Growing up has nothing to do with age. It just means you need to improve your swag quotient.

We live in a cool generation where you may be flowing down the river but first "Let me take a selfie."

Date a girl who looks good on a black and white driving license. Challenge accepted!

The method to drinking chilled beer is to see if is still breathing, if not then you need to proceed with CPR.

Bro tip: When you do something wrong and she says, "Its ok". Its not ok, don't do it. Its a trap.

No matter how funny it may seem play cool and classy. Keep it to one lol or one smiley per text.

Smart people know that before drinking or getting drunk, its better to delete all numbers than to drunk text.

No its not the cool breeze you're feeling, I with my cool attitude just walked by your house.

Next page: Original Whatsapp messages

Being cool in real life:
Always be witty and have a fine answer to every question or retort. Remember silence is an answer too. The internet has so many one lin